six years； and there is no excuse for the state they're in。”
“No？” My grandfather takes a deep breath and seems to weigh things in his mind for a few
seconds。 Then he says； “Tell me this； Rick。 If you had
a brother or sister or child who had a severe mental or physical handicap； what would you
do？”
It was like my granddad had passed gas in church。 My father's face pinched； his head shook；
and finally he said； “Chet； what does that have to do
with anything？”
My grandfather looks at him for a minute； then quietly says； “Juli's father has a retarded
brother； and—”
My father interrupts him with a laugh。 “Well； that explains a lot； doesn't it！”
“Explains…a lot？” my grandfather asks。 Quietly。 Calmly。
……… Page 41………
“Sure！ It explains why those people are the way they are … ！” He grins around the table at us。
“Must run in the family。”
Everyone looks at him。 Lyta's jaw drops； and for once she's speechless。 My mother says；
“Rick！” but all my father can do is laugh a nervous
kind of laugh and say； “It was just a joke！ I mean； obviously something's wrong with those
people。 Oh； excuse me； Chet。 I forgot。 The girl reminds
you of Renée。”
“Rick！” my mother says again； only this time she's mad。
“Oh； Patsy； please。 Your father's being overly dramatic； trying to make me feel bad for
criticizing our neighbors because there's a retarded
relative someplace。 Other people have family troubles and still manage to mow their lawn。
They should have a little pride in ownership； for cryin' out
loud！”
My grandfather's cheeks are seriously flushed； but his voice is rock…steady as he says； “They
don't own that house； Rick。 The landlord is
supposed to maintain the premises； but he doesn't。 And since Juli's father is responsible for
his brother； all their reserves go to his care； and
obviously it doesn't e cheap。”
Very quietly my mom asks； “Don't they have government facilities for that kind of thing？”
“I don't know the details； Patsy。 Maybe there are no government facilities nearby。 Maybe they
thought a private facility was a better place for him
to be。”
“Still；” my dad says； “there are government facilities available； and if they don't want to go
that route； that's their choice。 It's not our fault their
family had some sort of chromosomal abnormality； and I refuse to feel guilty for wanting — ”
My grandfather slams his hand on the table and half…stands as he says； “It had nothing to do
with chromosomes； Rick！ It was caused by a lack of
oxygen at birth。” He brings his voice down； but it makes his words seem even more forceful。
“Juli's uncle had the umbilical cord wrapped around his
neck。 Twice。 One minute he was a perfect little baby； just like your son； Bryce； and the next
he was irreversibly damaged。”
My mother was suddenly hysterical。 In seconds she was bawling her eyes out； wailing； and
my father was all over her； trying to calm her down。 It
was no use。 She basically dissolved right there on the spot。
Lyta threw her napkin down and muttered； “This family is a joke；” and took off。 Then my
mother bolted out of the room； sobbing into her hands；
and my father raced after her； throwing my grandfather the wickedest look I'd ever seen。
That left Granddad and me and a table full of cold food。 “Wow；” I finally said。 “I had no idea。”
“You still don't；” he told me。
“What do you mean？”
He sat there like granite for a minute； then leaned across the table toward me and said； “Why
do you suppose that upset your mother so much？”
“I…I don't know。” I gave a halfhearted grin and said； “Because she's female？”
He smiled； but just barely。 “No。 She's upset because she knows that she could very well be
standing in Mr。 Baker's shoes right now。”
I thought about it a minute and finally asked； “Did her brother have the cord around his neck
when he was born？”
He shook his head。
“Well； then …”
He leaned forward even farther and whispered； “You did。”
“I did？”
He nodded。 “Twice。”
“But …”
“The doctor who delivered you was on the ball； plus apparently there was some slack in the
cord； so he was able to loop it off as you came out。
……… Page 42………
You didn't hang yourself ing into the world； but it could very easily have gone the other
way。”
If I'd been told years or even weeks ago that I'd e down the chute noosed and ready to
hang； I'd have made some kind of joke about it； or
more likely I'd have said； Yeah； that's nice； now can you spare me the discussion？
But after everything that had happened； I was really freaking out； and I couldn't escape the
questions tidal…waving my brain。 Where would I be if
things had been different？ What would they have done with me？ From the way my dad was
talking； he wouldn't have had much use for me； that's for
sure。 He'd have stuck me in a nuthouse somewhere； any where； and forgotten about me。 But
then I thought； No！ I'm his kid。 He wouldn't do that …
would he？
I looked around at everything we had — the big house； the white carpet； the antiques and
artwork and stuff that was everywhere。 Would they have
given up all the stuff to make my life more pleasant？
I doubted it； and man； I doubted it big…time。 I'd have been an embarrassment。 Something to
try to forget about。 How things looked had always
been a biggie to my parents。 Especially to my dad。
Very quietly my granddad said； “You can't dwell on what might have been； Bryce。” Then； like
he could read my mind； he added； “And it's not fair to
condemn him for something he hasn't done。”
I nodded and tried to get a grip； but I wasn't doing a very good job of it。 Then he said； “By the
way； I appreciated your ment before。”
“What？” I asked； but my throat was feeling all pinched and swollen。
“About your grandmother。 How did you know that？”
I shook my head and said； “Juli told me。”
“Oh？ You spoke with her； then？”
“Yeah。 Actually； I apologized to her。”
“Well…！”
“And I was feeling a lot better about everything； but now … God； I feel like such a jerk again。”
“Don't。 You apologized； and that's what matters。” He stood up and said； “Say； I'm in the
mood for a walk。 Want to join me？”
Go for a walk？ What I wanted to do was go to my room； lock the door； and be left alone。
“I find it really helps to clear the mind；” he said； and that's when I realized that this wasn't just
a walk — this was an invitation to do something
together。
I stood up and said； “Yeah。 Let's get out of here。”
For a guy who'd only basically ever said Pass the salt to me； my granddad turned out to be a
real talker。 We walked our neighborhood and the
next neighborhood and the next neighborhood； and not only did I find out that my granddad
knows a lot of stuff； I found out that the guy is funny。 In a
subtle kind of