face doesn't ruin everything? There's no reason for your mother to
suffer。 As you're walking; please say; 'Mom; please listen to me。' Say it
now。〃
〃Mom; please listen to me;〃 my voice pleaded。 I walked very slowly to the
bedroom; feeling Alice's worried stare on my back。 I shut the door behind
me; trying to think clearly through the terror that gripped my brain。
〃There now; are you alone? Just answer yes or no。〃
〃Yes。〃
〃But they can still hear you; I'm sure。〃
〃Yes。〃
〃All right; then;〃 the agreeable voice continued; 〃say; 'Mom; trust me。'〃
〃Mom; trust me。〃
〃This worked out rather better than I expected。 I was prepared to wait;
but your mother arrived ahead of schedule。 It's easier this way; isn't
it? Less suspense; less anxiety for you。〃
I waited。
〃Now I want you to listen very carefully。 I'm going to need you to get
away from your friends; do you think you can do that? Answer yes or no。〃
〃No。〃
〃I'm sorry to hear that。 I was hoping you would be a little more creative
than that。 Do you think you could get away from them if your mother's
life depended on it? Answer yes or no。〃
Somehow; there had to be a way。 I remembered that we were going to the
airport。 Sky Harbor International Airport: crowded; confusingly laid out…
〃Yes。〃
〃That's better。 I'm sure it won't be easy; but if I get the slightest
hint that you have any pany; well; that would be very bad for your
mother;〃 the friendly voice promised。 〃You must know enough about us by
now to realize how quickly I would know if you tried to bring anyone
along with you。 And how little time I would need to deal with your mother
if that was the case。 Do you understand? Answer yes or no。〃
〃Yes。〃 My voice broke。
〃Very good; Bella。 Now this is what you have to do。 I want you to go to
your mother's house。 Next to the phone there will be a number。 Call it;
and I'll tell you where to go from there。〃 I already knew where I would
go; and where this would end。 But I would follow his instructions
exactly。 〃Can you do that? Answer yes or no。〃
〃Yes。〃
〃Before noon; please; Bella。 I haven't got all day;〃 he said politely。
〃Where's Phil?〃 I asked tersely。
〃Ah; be careful now; Bella。 Wait until I ask you to speak; please。〃
I waited。
〃It's important; now; that you don't make your friends suspicious when
you go back to them。 Tell them that your mother called; and that you
talked her out of ing home for the time being。 Now repeat after me;
'Thank you; Mom。' Say it now。〃
〃Thank you; Mom。〃 The tears were ing。 I tried to fight them back。
〃Say; 'I love you; Mom; I'll see you soon。' Say it now。〃
〃I love you; Mom。〃 My voice was thick。 〃I'll see you soon;〃 I promised。
〃Goodbye; Bella。 I look forward to seeing you again。〃 He hung up。
I held the phone to my ear。 My joints were frozen with terror — I
couldn't unbend my fingers to drop it。
I knew I had to think; but my head was filled with the sound of my
mother's panic。 Seconds ticked by while I fought for control。
Slowly; slowly; my thoughts started to break past that brick wall of
pain。 To plan。 For I had no choices now but one: to go to the mirrored
room and die。 I had no guarantees; nothing to give to keep my mother
alive。 I could only hope that James would be satisfied with winning the
game; that beating Edward would be enough。 Despair gripped me; there was
no way to bargain; nothing I could offer or withhold that could influence
him。 But I still had no choice。 I had to try。
I pushed the terror back as well as I could。 My decision was made。 It did
no good to waste time agonizing over the oute。 I had to think clearly;
because Alice and Jasper were waiting for me; and evading them was
absolutely essential; and absolutely impossible。
I was suddenly grateful that Jasper was gone。 If he had been here to feel
my anguish in the last five minutes; how could I have kept them from
being suspicious? I choked back the dread; the anxiety; tried to stifle
it。 I couldn't afford it now。 I didn't know when he would return。
I concentrated on my escape。 I had to hope that my familiarity with the
airport would turn the odds in my favor。 Somehow; I had to keep Alice
away…
I knew Alice was in the other room waiting for me; curious。 But I had to
deal with one more thing in private; before Jasper was back。
I had to accept that I wouldn't see Edward again; not even one last
glimpse of his face to carry with me to the mirror room。 I was going to
hurt him; and I couldn't say goodbye。 I let the waves of torture wash
over me; have their way for a time。 Then I pushed them back; too; and
went to face Alice。
The only expression I could manage was a dull; dead look。 I saw her alarm
and I didn't wait for her to ask。 I had just one script and I'd never
manage improvisation now。
〃My mom was worried; she wanted to e home。 But it's okay; I convinced
her to stay away。〃 My voice was lifeless。
〃We'll make sure she's fine; Bella; don't worry。〃
I turned away; I couldn't let her see my face。
My eye fell on a blank page of the hotel stationery on the desk。 I went
to it slowly; a plan forming。 There was an envelope there; too。 That was
good。
〃Alice;〃 I asked slowly; without turning; keeping my voice level。 〃If I
write a letter for my mother; would you give it to her? Leave it at the
house; I mean。〃
〃Sure; Bella。〃 Her voice was careful。 She could see me ing apart at
the seams。 I had to keep my emotions under better control。
I went into the bedroom again; and knelt next to the little bedside table
to write。
〃Edward;〃 I wrote。 My hand was shaking; the letters were hardly legible。
I love you。 I am so sorry。 He has my mom; and I have to try。 I know it
may not work。 I am so very; very sorry。
Don't be angry with Alice and Jasper。 If I get away from them it will be
a miracle。 Tell them thank you for me。 Alice especially; please。
And please; please; don't e after him。 That's what he wants。 I think。
I can't bear it if anyone has to be hurt because of me; especially you。
Please; this is the only thing I can ask you now。 For me。
I love you。 Forgive me。
Bella
I folded the letter carefully; and sealed it in the envelope。 Eventually
he would find it。 I only hoped he would understand; and listen to me just
this once。
And then I carefully sealed away my heart。
===========================================================================
22。 HIDEANDSEEK
It had taken much less time than I'd thought — all the terror; the
despair; the shattering of my heart。 The minutes were ticking by more
slowly than usual。 Jasper still hadn't e back when I returned to
Alice。 I was afraid to be in the same room with her; afraid that she
would guess… and afraid to hide from her for the same reason。
I would have thought I was far beyond the ability to be surprised; my
thoughts tortured and unstable; but I was surprised when I saw Alice bent
over the desk; gripping the edge with two hands。
〃Alice?〃
She didn't react when I called her name; but her head was slowly rocking
s